Dear Video Game Journalists,
Enough is enough. I need to kindly ask you to stop toying with my heart.
Over the years, we’ve had something of a love-hate relationship. Mainly, you love to lie to me and I hate you for it. You’ve broken my heart so many times and in so many ways, there’s not enough health kits or healing potions to put it back together again. And yet I keep coming back. Why? Because I can’t quit you.
So we’re both clear, I want to explain to you exactly what it is that you’ve done to make me this broken shell of a man. I want you to know just how deep you cut me.
Remember when you announced Diablo III? It’s been eighteen months and all I have to show for my slavish anticipation is a few screenshots, a video or two, and a promise that it might come out in 2011. And all those games that you assured me would be out in time for Christmas? Yeah, they might be ready for Labor Day. And while we’re airing grievances, do you remember way back in 1997 when you delayed Ocarina of Time for OVER A YEAR? I don’t think you understand what that kind of thing does to the psyche of ten year-old. Not that things have changed. In case you’ve forgotten, Splinter Cell: Conviction was supposed to be available way back in May 2008. A dozen release dates later and I’m still in need of a Sam Fisher fix. What gives?!
And while we’re at it, what about the things you promised that never came out? Remember B.C., that nifty game that allowed you to permanently alter the gameworld? Yeah, niether does anyway else because it never happened. Or Kid Icarus SNES–I mean, I’d still be willing to hand over a testicle for a shot at that game. And lest we forget, the mother of all dealyed games, Duke Nukem Forever, has been upgraded to the cancelled category!
Speaking of stuff that never showed up, if I had a nickle for every new game feature, multiplayer campaign, and DLC pack you promised but failed to deliver, I’d be a rich man. Instead, I’m a nervous wreck fretting over the upcoming Left 4 Dead 2 content and the state of Fable III.
Why do you insist on doing this to me? I give you all my money, I never go out with the boys anymore (Halo 3 makes sure of that), and you know I’m hopelessly devoted to you. In return, what do I get? Disappointment and thoughts of suicide. Thanks a lot.
Sure, I know it’s not all your fault. The video game industry is an unpredictable beast and you’re simply reporting which way it’ll charge next. It’s not your fault that developers stop developing and publishers refuse to publish. But you, time and again, have lifted my hopes with false promises and then dashed them with words like “postponed” and “cut”. I’m asking you, just this once, to take my feelings into consideration. Be honest with me. Be kind. Give me a real release date, not one that’ll be pushed back for years. Don’t tell me a game is being developed until its a guaranteed thing. And, for the love God, don’t trust a thing Peter Molyneux says.
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As always, I’d love to hear what you have to say. Keep a closer eye on me by following me on Twitter, and hit me up on Xbox Live (XBL: Broken Luck) if you’re looking for a co-op partner. Don’t forget to subscribe to the site and follow Fragmatica on Twitter and become our fan on Facebook for even more site related updates.
I loved this post, it was so fun to read!
To an extent, though, they really are just reporting what the developers/publishers tell them in terms of release dates. When they take those facts and begin to speculate, that’s where I think gaming journalists start losing their professionalism.
As users it’s OUR job to speculate and hype games, not theirs.
I’d agree with SummerElk. I think the gaming industry holds a lot more responsibility for the grievances you listed than journalists do. After all, it’s Blizzard releasing the small trickle of info for D3, and it’s Nintendo’s fault for never updating Kid Icarus, not some journalist from IGN or Joystiq. You are absolutely right about Molyneux though, man I hate that guy.
I don’t see how you put this train of thought together. Game journalists get just as disappointed when things get pushed back as you do. They’re not making up the release dates, they’re posting what they’re told.
You don’t give game journalists your money, you give game publishers (and retailers) your money.
Game journalists are not responsible for your unhappiness, they’re merely responsible for delivering the unhappiness.
Nicely put Justin, but you’ve missed the point. What you just read was an ad hominem argument (everyone’s favorite logical fallacy!). Of course it’s not the fault of game journalists that developers change their minds, push back dates, etc. which is a fact I’ve noted in the post. The truth is that journalists receive a lot of ire from the gaming community because they are the industry’s bearers of bad news. While I don’t blame gaming journalists for the news they report, they represent a tradition of miscommunication between gamers and developers/publishers. Whether it’s their intention or not, they serve as hype machines for industry and are often fed erroneous data. Shakespeare’s Henry IV and all that (look it up).
While I agree with all of you saying that game journalists for the most part just report what they are told and shouldn’t be help accountable for games being canceled, release dates being pushed back, etc., I think you’re kind of missing the point Broken Luck was trying to make, which in my opinion is that PR for games is often a disaster. Some of the time it’s the fault of the developer just letting things slip, some of the time it’s the journalist just going too far with a piece of information.